In the midst of the holiday season this year, I decided that I’d prefer that this January not suck.  I don’t like that word (My Momma hates it and never let us say it without giving us the stink eye) but really, how else can you describe January?  My sincerest apologies to those of you who love it for whatever reason.  But for me, I can’t even muster intelligent words to describe it.

In my effort to not ALLOW (I say this as though I have even the least bit of control over it), I knew I had to make some changes.   And by changes, I mean I over scheduled and set too many goals.  And damn if it didn’t work!

You’re probably asking yourself about my magic formula.  Ok, maybe not, but I’ll tell you.  Because who knows, maybe there’s another month that isn’t your cup of tea.

First, the easy stuff:

• Normally, January meal planning consists of comfort food: soup, chili, chicken dumpling casserole, heavy and filling comfort food.  (Read:  more weight gain.)  Not this year.  Gained enough weight in December for the next 3 months.  Comfort food will grace the menu occasionally at best.
• No resolutions. I don’t like the New Year holiday.  My resolutions are always broken.  And then I feel even worse about whatever I was resolving to correct or improve.  Cycle stops this year.  Resolution will be replaced with an attainable goal…that I will meet.
• Goal:  Every year, my house starts driving me batty in December when I don’t have time to do a dang thing about it.  I reason with myself that I’ll have all of January to clean that crap up and get ready for lots of family in town the first weekend in February.  Every January, I start and do a couple closets or piles and give up.    Not this year.  I will get through all the crappy spots, closets, spring cleaning issues.  All of them.  I made a list.  And boy, do I love marking things off a list.
• Therapy:  Can I get an Amen?

Then…the harder ones…

I will say yes instead of coming up with 47 reasons why I can’t do something…

And I will say no to things that I just don’t want to do.

But mostly, I will say yes.

You know those blogs or memes or Facebook posts about the extroverted introverts?  They love to be asked but ultimately when the day comes, they really just want to stay in their pajamas and be left alone…or they are so chatty and have these seemingly outward personalities when, you guessed it, they really want to be at home in their pajamas or they need 3 hours of decompress time for every 2 hours they spend socializing?  Couldn’t be more me.  Up one side, down the other.  Queen of that kingdom.  President and founder of the club.  I’m THE extroverted introvert.  Makes me tired just thinking about it.  Hand me my pjs, will ya?  Yet, in December, the craziest thing happened …I was asked to go to three different January events.  Social. Things.  Put on your makeup, buy a ticket, put it on your calendar and lose money if you don’t show up things.  All were with different friends and all in….wait for it…. JANUARY.   But I said yes.  To all the January, social, buy the ticket things.

I’m not going to even try to convince you that I didn’t think about bailing on some or all of these events.  Actually, for one of them, I was bailed on.  And it was the one I was looking forward to most.  But my dear friend was having a really gnarly week.  And a gnarly week in January at that.  Bless.  Those really are the worst.   As luck would have it, my event going friend (we go listen to authors together, it’s our thing), had missed getting a ticket before it sold out so BOOM, the night was instantly saved.   I adore spending time with her.  She’s a few years ahead of me in this game of life… not many but her youngest kid is the same age as my oldest so I look to her for advice.  We view a lot of things similarly especially when it comes to kids and parenting, so I highly value her opinion.  So just like that, we are splitting an entree at a farm to table restaurant while I’m picking her brain about orthodontics and high school.  Shortly after, we are listening to Jen Hatmaker entertain us with her beautiful wisdom and awesome fashion sense.   I said yes.  It didn’t go as planned.  And it was still fantastic.   And to my friend who had the gnarly week, you know who you are…and I’m holding out for our Marlow’s date.  There are chips to be inhaled and snorts of laughter to be shared.

Another friend had been telling me about Menopause, the Musical for years.  She told me about it probably three or four years ago and swore we MUST go if it ever came back to town.  We both noticed it was coming to a little theater in about 45 minutes away and declared that we’d be there!  I forgot about it until she texted to say that she was afraid we would miss out on tickets and asked whether I wanted one for a Thursday night in January.  I thought, “Ugh, prime pajama time,” but said, “Yes.  Get me a ticket.  I’ll be there.”  It was an absolute hoot!  Get this, Megan Cavanagh, the actress who played Marla Hooch (the homely but super strong hitter who played 2nd base) in A League of Their Own was one of the actresses in the play!  The restored theater was in the town square area so the ladies had picked a little mom and pop’s Italian restaurant in the square for dinner.  Running behind due to a work call, I just made it in time for dinner and thank goodness I did because I had HOMEMADE GLUTEN FREE PIZZA. (Read that again: HOMEMADE gf pizza.)  All I can say about that is that I’d make the 45 minute drive for that pizza again.  And if the kids have events over that way, we will figure out a way to stop by that amazing little Italian place… where I ate…homemade gf pizza..on a Thursday night… in January…. because I said yes.

Finally, our small group at church has Girl’s Night Out occasionally and there’s a new one of those do-it-yourself workshops in town that the girls wanted to try.  Turns out, when these places run a New Year’s special and you post fun events on Facebook, even church folks who aren’t in your small group turn out!   We had so much fun just hanging out being crafty.   We nail gunned and sanded and stained and painted and stenciled and all the crafty, artsy things.   For almost four hours, we laughed out loud and talked about all the craziness of life.   And we walked away with our homemade boxes and signs.  But mostly, we made a memory.    Because nine of us said yes.

During the fall, spring and summer, we spend a lot of time at ball fields.   Our daughter usually participates in her school musical during the winter but somehow it’s tucked very neatly into parts of December, January and the show is in early February.   (I think it’s because most of her commitments are fulfilled after school.)   Because our year feels pretty packed otherwise, sometimes it feels as though the only real free weekend time we have is in January and February.  And as much as I like to plan, spontaneity works well for us when it comes to getting together with friends.   So, that’s what we did.  On those free Saturday nights, we met up with my cousin (might as well be sister) and her family and with another family who is near and dear to us.   With my cousin, they seated us in a corner.  Well played, Cali Dreaming.  Well played.  (Did we look like a loud crew?  Don’t answer that.)   With our church/softball/dear friends, they put us smack dab in the middle of the restaurant.  Bless their hearts.  Our waiter was a good sport but we had catching up to do and limited time to do it.  Is it bad when your kids start asking when we’re leaving?  I’m asking for a friend, of course.  Yes to Saturday night dinners with friends!

MLK weekend was fast approaching.  The kids and I were out of school and work.  The Hubs was not.  Sister and The Girls had planned to visit our parents.  My BIL wasn’t off either. So, the Thursday before, I threw caution to the wind and decided to take a road trip to meet up with them at Momma and Daddy’s.  Nothing like retail therapy, dinner with the girls (Nana D and Em, that is), some little kid fun, sleeping late and just hanging out for the weekend.  We said yes.

Every January, I count down the days until it’s over.  Most years, I start counting somewhere between Days 2 and 6, but this year, I made it to Day 29 before I hit the wall.  Make no mistake, tears were shed during the month, lots of ice cream was eaten late at night when no one else was awake and could watch me.  The ice that kept us inside for several days made me question my sanity.  But it turns out, making plans, being social, saying yes to everything except daily comfort food may be the keys to surviving challenging winter weeks or months… and counting down from 29 to 31 ain’t too bad.